Three things: The Halloween in GMail-chat edition

Colorful mobiles
Originally uploaded by yaznotjaz.

I first got an inkling that Halloween this year was going to generate funny conversations when my buddy Z IMed me at the beginning of October with, “I’m gonna go as Ahmedinejad for Halloween.” Seriously, I didn’t even have a comeback to compete with that. In true Yasmine fashion, I believe my response was laughter and resounding approval: “ROCKING.”

The evening of Halloween, I got home from work at 8pm with a pounding headache, crawled onto the sofa with my favorite psychedelic-colored comfort blanket, and watched Dancing with the Stars and Boston Legal while eating Chinese leftovers from dinner with T and B the evening before. In between exchanging text messages with T – who was trying to convince me to 1. invest in orange flares and 2. visit the East Coast – I kept an attentive ear out for trick-or-treaters stopping by. (Un)fortunately, only about half a dozen kids showed up in total – since Casa420 [my home] is located on a narrow, winding, “scary” street, as I had been explaining to Z earlier in the day – which meant I ended up with lots of leftover Halloween candy. I’m not complaining. As the following conversations show, I’m a huge fan of free candy – and so are my friends, it seems.

GMail conversation with A, mid-October:

yasmine: i like halloween
yasmine: well, i like candy, so i jump at any chance to get free candy
A: same here
A: I once got into an argument with someone that Halloween is haram [forbidden/prohibited]
A: it was quite amusing
A: I don’t think they got the commercial aspect of free candy
yasmine: “HALLOVEEEN IS…BID’AH [religious innovation]!”
A: hahahaha
A: I was like, “you can make it halal [permissible]“
A: can dress up as your favourite Imam, that type of thing
A: “I’m Bukhari! I’m Bukhari!”
yasmine: that’s freakin’ hilarious
yasmine: i want to be al-ghazali, in that case
yasmine: al-ghazali was a ROCKSTAR
yasmine: mashaAllah
A: hahahahaha
A: yeah, I’m an idiot
A: needless to say, haven’t spoken to that person again
A: they started telling me about how it’s all so paganistic
yasmine: oh yeah, i bet
yasmine: they probably think you’re all haraam now
yasmine: vat a BLASPHEMER!
A: and then I told them about the days of the week in the Julian calendar
A: and how they’re based on pagan gods

A’s GMail status on October 31st: “Halloween mubarak!”

yasmine: so, are you dressed as your favorite imam?
A: no, not at all
A: I kinda went the other route!
yasmine: hahaha and what would that be?
A: I dressed up as a devil
yasmine: what’re you wearing, exactly?
A: well, got the hair-band thing with the devil horns that light up
A: and then got a mini-trident that lights up
A: wore all black clothes
yasmine: oh dude, you’re rocking it up, aren’t you
A: and came into work, made a sign in MS Word
A: using the word art font
A: that said “Prada”
A: taped it on my back
yasmine: i am silently laughing so hard at work right now
A: and I became “The Devil Wears Prada” :)
yasmine: you are so freakin’ hilarious
A: hahaha
A: I’m just an idiot
yasmine: to steal a line from my buddy hijabman: “HIGHFIVE!”
A: I thought this up last night at the dollar store
A: Oopar paanch! :)

And, of course, the incomparable Z, who started it all:

Z at 4.30pm: Attention: the secretaries have chocolate and lots of it
Z: they are sitting behind it right now
Z: but they leave in precisely T minus half an hour
Z: this is when we strike

Z at 5.05pm: READY YOUR MEN
Z: ATTAAAAAAACK
yasmine: mygod, you’re on crack
yasmine: CANDY CRACK!
Z: we had to retreat, the guard hadn’t retired yet
Z: which is weird, they’re usually gone by 5
Z: but we’re gearing up for another pass
Z: and man, is it gonna be glorious
Z: see? i can have fun at work without you
Z: it just takes a little imagination
yasmine: i hate you. stop having fun without me, dammit

Z at 5.43pm: carla took the candy
Z: stupid carla

>CONTINUE READING

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